A Pain In My Eye

There is no specific scenario to which this situation applies. This can happen at absolutely any time. You could be writing an exam, giving birth, reading a book, or skydiving. In which case, let's just say you're about to diffuse a bomb. Make things more interesting.

So you find yourself in the overplayed dramatic situation where a bomb is counting down, about to explode. It come down to two different wires. If you cut the right one, thousands of people live to see another day. If you cut the wrong one, well, it's not like you'll have to hear about it later.

You only have 10 seconds left.

10....

9....

8....

7....

Suddenly, there's a stabbing pain in your eye. Your hand instinctively drops the wires and goes to your eye. That's it. It's all over. You get a split second to realize that the bomb went off and you are gone.

All because of an eyelash.

It had one job. ONE  job. All it had to do was keep things out of your eye so that you could carry on with your life-saving activities. But no. Instead of keeping these things out of your eye, it had to go and get itself in your eye. Really then, what is its use if it opposes its only purpose?

That's like a fireman going around setting buildings on fire. I'm pretty sure you'd get rid of him. But do we get rid of eyelashes? No! Instead, we consider them a thing of beauty. Women so badly want thick, dark eyelashes, that they paint them so. They glorify these serious offenders!

I don't know about you, but too many times have I found myself desperately clawing at my face, eyes red, painful, and swollen, because that useless hair is getting a little too cozy with my retina.

So please, eyelashes, if you can somehow here my plea, just do your job. I beg of you.  

Thank you kindly!